So now that I’ve beaten the game, I don’t know, enough it feels like (5? times), I feel like I know the bosses a little bit better.

actually tough

  1. Smough & Ornstein: these 2 are just so hard without a summons, especially if you target Smough first; I think Lifehunt Scythe +5 worked well here, but deep down I know Greatshield of Artorias truly carried me
  2. Manus, Father of the Abyss: just brutal spam with that giant arm, a real stamina battle even with a shield
  3. Knight Artorias: this is the best boss in the game
  4. Gwyn, Lord of Cinder: fuck this boss, bullshit grabs like a tractor beam, dashes like Ornstein, can’t break your guard at all but once you attack he always trades
  5. Capra Demon: absolute bullshit, all I can do is dodge right, left, up the stairs, throw 2 firebombs and hope I’m not dead before I can L1; fuck the Capra Demon

actually fun

I mean, the entire game is fun, but you know what I mean, these are really great:

  1. Priscilla: her Lifehunt Scythe is my favorite weapon of the game, and the footsteps thing is fun (what seeketh thee? that scythe, yo!)
  2. Sif: I love the dog, even though he can’t really hurt you if you play it right; such a cool area, so memorable
  3. Gargoyles: to be honest I was maybe 6-hitting them with the Black Knight Sword, but it’s quite fun to dance around the roof, with the angled ground, kind of like Logarius in Bloodborne
  4. Dark Sun Gwyndolin: dodging hadoukens, collecting throwing knives with a greatshield, hiding behind pillars, playing tag; as long as you brought a magic ring, what’s not to like?
  5. Iron Golem: I admit, he knocked me off the ledge once, but I got him in the knee, so fair’s fair; this is as close to sword-fight-sumo-wrestling as we’re going to get, folks


  1. Quelaag: lava on, back off; lava off, back on: we get it
  2. Taurus Demon: I hate when he knocks you off, so I cheesed him with drop damage, otherwise fair like the Cleric Beast in Bloodborne
  3. Gaping Dragon: the thing in the Depths, hits hard but real slow, kind of like Ebrietas from Bloodborne
  4. Ceaseless Discharge: is there a way to fight this honorably? I always cheesed it in the hallway
  5. Asylum Demon: I remember it being harder my first playthrough, but who doesn’t?
  6. Centipede Demon: it’s cool that the arms/tail/whatever come off, but not bad once you get to “the beach” over on the right

just annoying

  1. Gravelord Nito: I don’t like group fights, divine weapons, or magic swords that pop out of the ground
  2. Black Dragon Kalameet: not that hard with the right equipment, just keeps moving out of range
  3. Stray Demon: fuck this boss, giant magic blasts and hits like a train from across a stadium but also slow as a cow
  4. Bed of Chaos: fuck this whole fucking boss fight, what a waste of time; if you know, you know
  5. Sanctuary Demon: never gives you time to heal, I never seem to get it on the first try, but whatever

so dumb

  1. Moonlight Butterfly: what were they thinking? I summoned the witch, who basically just drained the Butterfly in seconds, literally not even 20 seconds I did no damage just tanked 3-4 hits
  2. Seath: just dumb, feels like the boss in the Plaza in Bloodborne, so dumb
  3. Pinwheel: I remember this boss, vaguely, seems like you just 6-hit or so
  4. whatever it’s called, at the bottom of the Demon Ruins, before Centipede Demon, again just 6-hit or so

my build

I lucked into dropping a Black Knight Sword in the Undead Burg, so basically:

before Sif

  • Black Knight Sword +5?
  • Heater Shield +0

before Ariamis

  • Black Knight Sword +5
  • Greatshield of Artorias +0

after Ariamis

  • Lifehunt Scythe +5
  • Greatshield of Artorias +0

but sometimes you need (like for Manus, or Kalameet)

  • Black Knight Sword +5
  • Cleansing Greatshield +0

Armor-wise, I like the Gold-Hemmed Black Set, or the Dingy +5 set. Fire Keepers, represent! Armor doesn’t seem to matter as much behind a greatshield.

Previous runs, I’ve gone Rapier / Silver Knight Shield, or Uchigatana / Silver Knight Shield, or Demon’s Spear / Tower Shield. Almost nothing in the game seems to beat the BKS, so getting it kind of forced my hand. I decided against using a parrying shield this time, as there aren’t really that many enemies it works against.

This was my first run with the Greatshield of Artorias. That shield is so fucking good, it’s incredible. 88 stability is bonkers, especially with the wolf ring. Just stand there. <3 Sif & Artorias.

It took me 22 hours, so not exactly a speed run. Fun runs only. Previously, it’s taken me maybe 40 hours, so I’m definitely wasting less time. I skipped some stuff, like Siegmeyer’s quest (sorry, onion friendo), the Lost Izalith shortcut, clearing the Great Hollow 100%, officially boring stuff. Again, fun runs only.